by Matt | Dec 4, 2001 | Imported Entry
It’s weird… I feel like I’ve let myself and others down. But I don’t know how that could be. See, every year, around Christmas, I start to feel depressed. I don’t know why, I just do. This is the basic problem: I’m poor. Well, ok, I’m not “poor” but I’m a college student and I have no money. I also have a girl-friend, family and friends I would like to buy presents for. Presents are hard to come by for free. So I feel bad. I can’t get the important people in my life something nice. So, as anyone would understand, I try and consentrate the pathetic amount of money I have into finding something nice for the girl who will very likely be “Mrs Perry” in a few years. Again I feel sad. I can’t afford nice things. Here comes the speech about it’s not the gift but the thought that counts. You can save your breath, I’ve heard that one a few times. It doesn’t matter to me. I should be able to do something nice for the person I love most, and I can’t. I feel like an ungreatful piece of crap. So, I dip into my savings, or what little there is, realizing that this means I won’t be able to get myself anything for Christmas, that I’m spending birthday money given to me on other people, and this makes me feel a little better, knowing that I’m giving up something, or anything for that matter, for someone else. This also drains my bank account, and thus the vicous cycle repeats. Why can’t I have a nice job and make enough money to make others happy. I doesn’t upset me to have nothing for myself. What upsets me is to have next to nothing for someone else.
I’m sorry, I’m babling like an idiot. I’m going to go to bed now. Sorry to take up your time. Sorry. Sorry. Night.
by Matt | Dec 4, 2001 | Imported Entry
Chip & Chris:
Guys… how would you feel about the idea of a group journal/site? We’re all opinionated, might be interesting… sort of usr/bin/girl meets movie reviews and mindless ranting. whatcha think? It’s been done before… but not by us. hehe.
by Matt | Dec 3, 2001 | Imported Entry
Hey, Brent’s got web space yo! Check out his LJ if you’re bored. Clicky Here
by Matt | Dec 3, 2001 | Imported Entry
What a random afternoon. After blabbering for a bit (see below) I got a call from my Dad. His truck wouldn’t start and he needed a ride. So, I went to pick him up. Unfortunatly, the directions I got from him weren’t even close and I ended up driving around for at least and hour and a half. After that we needed to run errands and since his truck wasn’t starting, I became the taxi. I didn’t really mind though, I didn’t have anything better to do. So, sometime around 3, he finished what he needed to do and I dropped him off at home, only to be bombarded with irresponsibility insults relating to my loan/school situation. This was something I did not need. I sat there being berated and eventually left the house around 4. I wondered over to the mall to see if I could find Lauren something nice for X-mas. I kinda-sorta found something but I’d like to get something else to go along with it. After that I stopped by EB and hung out with those guys for a bit, listening to Brent’s girl troubles and more district manager bashing. Ah, I miss the retail life… well, not really, but it’s still nice to visit. So, I got back a little while ago and help my Mom get down the Christmas decorations and now I’m taking a break for some dinner and some blogging. I guess thats about it. Later.
by Matt | Dec 3, 2001 | Imported Entry
Note: the post below this one was supposed to be uploaded on Sunday, but it didn’t happen. Not like its a big deal or anything.
As for today’s real post…
I didn’t really have a grandeous scheme for the afternoon. I planned on spending my Amazon.com gift certificate (thanks Aunt Lisa) and heading to the mall to shop for Lauren for X-mas. I don’t know if I’ll get to that however, because my Dad caught me just as he was leaving the house. He told me to do a few loads of laundry, call two loan agencies about loan applications, and to wait around until noon because some lady had called and wanted to talk to me about my FAFSA application. Now, I didn’t plan on doing any of this, but I figured I might want to stick around for this lady to call back. I swear to God, if they’ve messed up my application AGAIN, there’ll be some screaming going on.
Now, let me explain WHY. You see, when you don’t have enough money to pay for college on your own, like me, you need to find some way of paying for it. So, you first fill out a FAFSA, or Fedral Application for Student Aid, or something like that. Basically you’re asking the government to help you out. They usually don’t but atleast you give it a shot. After that you turn your attention to other loan sources. Privately funded loan corporations that give you money in exchange for higher interest rates on the payback. Usually, these companies need to see that you’ve applied with your FAFSA before they can process anything, so it’s imporant to fill that out as a first step. Now, along that way, there are a few pot-holes that your application can get stuck in. The main problem being that you don’t contact these people directly, you send your paper work to your college of choice, they fill out the line that says how much you need and then send it back to the government or the companies. So, if your school finacial aid office sucks, like mine does, this can take a little while. Sometimes, they might really suck and accidential misplace your application. Well, there are hundreds of possible ways your schools financial aid office can suck or screw something up, and in the past 4 months, I’ve had the pleasure of experiencing ALL OF THEM!
I’ve had things lost, returned incomplete, mismailed, filled out incorrectly, not turned in on time. Basically, this year has been a financial aid nightmare. And if some lady is calling today at noon to tell me more bad news, she’s made a terrible, terrible mistake. It’s not her fault I keep telling myself, don’t shoot the messenger, but, who do you shoot? Someone needs to be informed about their offices blatent stupidity. I have no problem with walking into the office itself and raising a stink, I have before, and I’m suprised security hasn’t been called, but at the moment I’m not in GA. We’ll see what this lady has to say, maybe it’s “congradulations, we’ve awarded you a huge sum of money”, but I doubt it. Let’s all cross fingers shall we.
Lets see, what else. Oh, I finished my new book. Damn my quick reading skills. I bought a book the other day and sat down to read it last night. Around 9 Lauren called and I talked to her for a good two hours before saying goodnight and returning to my book. Around 12 I realized I was on page 140 of 210 and said “what the hell” and just kept reading until I finished it. It was a “tear-jerker” too, I was getting all misty-eyed at the end. It was short but it was pretty good. I almost hate to admit that it was by the same author that wrote “Message in a Bottle”. But, check it out if you’re in the mood for a cheesy old fashion love story. I was, so I picked up “A Walk to Remember” by Nicholas Sparks, which by the way, will be ruined this spring by what I’m sure will be a sappy teen romance flick by the same name, it’s set to hit the big screen after new years.
Ok, I’m gonna go spend a gift certificate and hop in the shower. Later.
Recent Comments